Remus Lupin's Lament
by WolvenRose
Summary: Just a poem I thought I'd write, not REALLY a poem, but sort of like a poem worked into a story. Hope you like it. I was feeling sort of sad at the time when I wrote it, as you can probably tell.


**Remus Lupin's Lament**

**Disclaimer: **I don't own any of the characters, Remus, Sirius, James or Lily. I wish I did though. Except Peter, I don't want to own him. By the way, if you haven't read the fifth book, then don't read this poem, it's a big spoiler.

Baby Harry sat on his mother's knee, smiling widely at the people around him. Harry's father was right next to his mother, talking about the young days when Sirius, Remus, and sometimes Peter, would pull pranks on the students and teachers at school. Sirius was joining in on the conversation, and laughing as well, when Sirius brought up the subject of Snape, hanging in midair upside down with quite a few students watching too.

James, Sirius, Remus, Lily, and Peter were all gathered in the Potter's living room of their cozy house. Lily was busy with Harry at the moment, and James and Sirius were of course, busy talking about the wonderful days of Hogwarts.

Peter had his head cocked to one side, and was listening intently to Padfoot and Prongs.

They seem so much like brothers, Remus thought to himself, with a rare smile as he watched and listened to James and Sirius laugh, talk and act out some parts of their great pranks.

Remus had started feeling lonesome those days, when they went to visit the Potters, and Sirius would immediately start talking to James.

It wasn't like he was jealous of Sirius, to have such a great friend like that, it wasn't in Remus' nature to really be jealous anyway.

But no matter what James or Sirius told him, he still felt like an outcast among people, and among his friends sometimes as well.

It was a lonliness in his heart that only the feel of death could fill up. Remus couldn't really nourish the lonliness anymore. He had done so before, when he thought of his friends. But now, when he thought of his friends, when he saw their faces in his mind's eye, he saw different people. There was Padfoot, the godfather to Baby Harry, holding Harry in arms, and smiling proudly as if Harry was his own son.

And there was James next to Lily, holding her hand and also looking as if he was the happiest man on earth.

And then Lily, with a slight blush on her cheeks that still showed when James kissed her.

But where was the wolf that howled on the full moons?

Where was the monster that these people called a friend?

He was alone. Alone to roam the world without his friends anymore,

Alone to smile, and alone to laugh at his friends' jokes,

He had been given a chance, one last chance to call his own,

But with that chance came doubt, regret, hesitation.

And now, after he had lost James and Lily to Voldemort,

And after Sirius had been taken by his cousin,

Remus thought back on the times when he was young, just like Sirius and James had on their visits to the Potter's house before they died, and Remus now used his chance, his one last chance that he had to make things happy again. But when he thought of the times that the Marauders spent time together, no matter how young or old, it always brung tears to his eyes.

And yet, the tears could almost be called the one thing to fulfill the heart-stabbing emptiness inside him.

Somehow he believed that Sirius could live along with him, share memories with him like James used to do. Remus had been lonely since the start, and it only increased and doubled when he lost his last friend. The dog star. Sirius Black was like a light in all places.

He could make you laugh when you were crying, or smile when you were frowning.

Sometimes Remus thought that Sirius could even make the rain stop just for you, and make the sun come out, with a beautiful rainbow showing there. But now, in all this darkness, there was no Sirius Black to pull you through, to make you laugh or turn your frown right-side-up. The sun shined these days, but without a friend by your side, how could you enjoy the light?

Remus Lupin was still the same person. Still the same man now, that had enjoyed days with his friends, taken walks with James and Sirius. But even if his appearance didn't change, he could now feel things that he never felt before. Things that he didn't want to feel.

It was like a werewolf transformation, except this pain was felt only in one's heart.


End file.
